Terms of Endearment

Some bloggers refer to their children by their nicknames to preserve anonymity in the blogosphere.  I considered this option at one point, but realized mine had made it to this place in their little lives' timelines without any.  It's not for a lack of me calling them things besides their given names, even in front of other people.  It's just that I have a bit of a willy-nilly way of arbitrarily assigning, at any given moment, one of any number of names to either of them without regard to which I'm referring.  If I used any of these to reference one or both of the boys in my blog, nobody would know who I was talking about.  Especially our family.

 

The important thing is that in life, in real-time moments, the special boy to whom I am speaking has known it is he who is the object of my affection at the time when he hears me call him:

• Baby
• Scooter
• Booger
• Stinker
• Fart Knocker
• Boo Boo
• Tooter
• My Minion
• Mr. Poopy Pants
• Tooty-Patooty
• Dirty Face (in the voice of the Orbit Gum Lady)

 

The only one that they've scowled about is Baby, when they hit that age of protest that they were 'not a baby anymore'.  One quick explanation that they'd always be my baby and they understood I called them that because I loved them.  They never have had the same problem or questioned why I've called them Booger...or any of the other seemingly offensive names to those hyper-sensitive organic-only-applesauce mothers who would think it damaging to their self-esteem.  My children know that I say these things with love, not in an abusive tone, and that I'm truly their biggest fan.  I'm also usually saying it as I'm putting them in a big momma bear snuggle hug.

 

I hope that readers can keep this in mind if they ever question why names are not changed to protect the innocent.  I hope my kids will keep in mind when they're older that while I held nothing back here in letting everyone know their embarrassing stories, I will not, under any circumstances, show their girlfriends naked pictures of them in the bathtub.  Booger and Stinker will surely thank me for that, right?


"Yeah, nobody will see this picture but us....don't worry."