Thursday, March 3, 2011

Sometimes Mommy drops the F-Bomb

It has been a very long couple of weeks.  I will not get into the specifics of my woes, but I will say that I have dropped the F-Bomb so many times recently that my very closest friends are likely convinced that I have developed Tourette's and/or need a medication analysis.  One in particular felt responsible for "pushing me over the edge" the other day, but I assured her (and you now) that she did not.  Here are a few of my F's.  Let's get them out of the way, shall we?

Okay, so that feels better now.  Sometimes mommies, even good mommies, need to let those rip.  I do not let them fly around the kids, but I sure do around those few people good enough to make it through the treacherous trenches of turbulent years of friendship with me.  They are the only ones who understand when you're having a F*ing horrid day and need to blast a few out.  Then it's back to business.  If anyone thinks this might not be necessary, let me point out that I only have so much storage space.  The storage that these F's could occupy is already taken up by all the farts I've been holding in - so sorry, it's one or the other.  You make your choices and I'll make mine, and so far my friends prefer my periodic verbal unloading so thanks.
 Anyhoo....Esten melted my heart a bit when I was unloading his backpack and found that Blue Bear had tagged along to school.  I asked about it and Esten dashed to the coat closet,
"Oh please don't be mad at me Mommy, please?  But sometimes I just like to put Blue Bear in there just because he's my bestest buddy in the whole world because he has been my friend since I was born and it just makes my heart feel all good to know that he's there with me on the bus and waiting in my backpack in my cubie during class, I never take him out because if he got lost I would be like so so so so sad, but Mrs. Potts has this lost and found box that if someone found him they would put him in there and then if I found him I could be happy again but I won't lose him so please don't be mad at me Mom, okay?"
And just how could any mommy be mad at that?  All you can do is wrap him up in your arms and be thankful that you have a child who is so sensitive and loving and who helps you to put things in perspective on a daily basis.
Then there's Clayton, equally loved, differently talented.  Mostly in the performing arts, like skating/ballet on wood floors in socks with a superman jammies/buzz lightyear bathrobe/cowboy hat/ski goggle costume while playing the guitar.  I informed him on March 1st that a very special day was just around the corner, coming very very soon, in a couple of weeks.

"Thanksgiving!!! YES! I KNEW IT!!!"
"Well? WHAT THEN?"
"Uhm, well...your Birthday? Remember? March 11th is your Birthday?"
"YES!!! And I'm gonna have a STAR WARS CAKE and my cousins are gonna come, and........"

And it will be an afternoon of chaos and cake, wherein mommy will absorb the essence of all the kids and once again build up her reserves and resistances to all those adults in our stupid dummy-head grown up world where things happen and people cause me to have to launch into F-word-laced diatribes where I sound like Melanie Gibson.  It will be nice while it lasts.